It has to be said..

The Yogis say die to yourself everyday, this way when it comes time to die it won’t be so difficult because you will have been practicing bit by bit, day by day. Although it may sound potentially morbid, it can be actually quite liberating.

Our stories give measure to our lives. They make us who we are but when we start stripping away the story, what’s left?  Who are we without our story?

Over the years I have said goodbye to so many things, people and ideas of who I thought I was and where I thought my life was going.  And I thought I had grieved.  I really did. I work in the field so it would be automatic that I would be on top of my grieving. It turns out, I’m not.

When my Mother died, my beloved cat Fiona died, my Dad died soon after and another sweet cat Eli transitioned shortly afterwards. Our family home was sold and my sisters retreated further away from me for reasons only family can decipher. Regardless, I trudged on.

The person I was with my Mother died. The person I was with my Father died. The girl who lived in that house died. Pieces of me all over the world and no way to paste it all back together – so I fell apart and I’m still falling.  I’ll never get that girl back. She’s gone and what’s left is someone I am still trying to get to know. She’s gentle and kind, complex and deeply flawed, creative and introverted, wise and childlike, capable and trustworthy.  She’s a friend to a small few but it’s tight. She loves animals more than people at times, which is fine with her.  She remembers her life through words and stories and poems. She feels to a depth few dare to go, yet the beasts travel there with her and they stay.

I help people along their grieving journey. I hold space with them as they express their deepest sorrow and pain and I love them as though they were me, which in truth – they are.  Most people are going through loss of one kind of another and it’s always more severe than they let on. Trust me.

My Mum was the only one who understood me. She loved the tornado that I was, even though we went through many storms together. My Dad loved me in a different way that cemented me to the earth. My aunts held me in their hearts every day of their life. It all made me the person I was. I saw myself through them. Their vision of me gave me life and that vision died when they left this earth.

We don’t realize how critical it is to be seen. I’m a writer and I can tell you there is one thing more important to me than writing, and it’s being read.  

Dog Parks Are Not Just For Dogs

I live in Alpine and it has a lot going for it, wide opens spaces, good food and cheerful people who happen to love their animals as much as I do, but what it lacks is a dog park, at least one that is known.  I say that because when I moved here I started taking my dogs to an enclosed baseball field by a local church for their off leash runs.  I always knew how lucky we were so I made sure I was super diligent about picking up and leaving the park in a good state (gopher holes excluded). Continue reading

Love Heals All Things

I love helping people feel good. It lights me up like nothing else and I do in a million and one ways. One of those ways is through the power of affirmative prayer.

As I am particularly interested in helping people with their mental, spiritual, emotional and physical wellbeing, I love to read and study and am quite addicted to books which all lead me to believe this one particular truth – we are all connected. What that means in terms of being a practitioner is that I know my thought produces results. But it is not limited to practitioners, anyone can do this.

As there is but one mind, there are no private thoughts and one can therefore, with confidence, know that they can send a healing thought to anyone and they will receive it. We are receivers and transmitters in physical form. Strip that away and we are just vibration, energy waves of love, peace and joy – our truest nature.

We live in a society of much busyness, so it is hard to re-learn or think that our thoughts produce tangible results. Yes, going to see someone when they are not doing well is good, but sending a loving thought has instant ramifications, not only for the person it is going towards, but also for the sender, the world and everyone in it.

Our thoughts are the healing currency of the universe. This is not some fancy idealism; it has been studied, proven and practiced for eons.

With a loving thought two bodies become one. So sending a healing thought and loving intention to another is priceless. It is the balm that heals all things, changes all conditions and produces a new world.  The Kingdom is and has always been wrapped in the frequency of love.

And with that – I send my love to you.


The Wisdom of Hurt ~ building a better world

The times we live in have so many people asking similar questions – how can I help build a better world? Answer: the only way you can – by being yourself. By finding out what you love, what moves your soul, and how you can allow that manifest in the world.

Without a doubt, the loss of my cat Fiona has been the toughest loss of my life. It was my first animal loss, the deepest fissure.  As a young adult my best friend Sinead passed suddenly. She got hit by an Irish bus on a wet day, on the unforgiving Dublin streets. I pushed that grief away for a century or more, until Fiona’s loss helped me deal with it.

I’ve said goodbye to both parents, friends, most of my aunts and uncles, even people that are no longer in my life. I’ve also mourned the person who I thought I was, welcoming in the person I am now. I’ve said goodbye to many more animals along the way. It’s just what happens when you love.

As I recovered from Fiona’s passing, I grew. I grew in ways I could never have understood before. And with that, I decided to help other people deal with pet loss. And that is what I have been doing for over a decade now. It’s taken many forms this quest, but as I say it is just different words to the same song – letting your light shine so other people may find their way home.

I had no idea as a young adult of the power that awaited me beyond the losses of life and that my vulnerability to suffering would be the doorway to healing and to life, and in that process becoming a better person for my community and ultimately myself.

~And this is the only way I know how to build a better world.

The Intimacy of Life and Fleas


It has become increasingly more apparent that who we spend time with really matters.

We have all heard the saying; lie down with dogs, get fleas, or something like that – but when we translate that into real life experience and our desire to be healthy and happy – it could not be more true.

In a study it was discovered that human beings make use of mirror neurons to read emotion as well as action. The same sections of our brain that activate when we experience a range of human emotions, from joy to pain, also activate when we observe the emotion in another. We simply need to observe a person’s facial expression or body language to set the cascade of neurons in motion. When you see someone smile or grimace, as far as your brain is concerned – it is you who are happy or disturbed.

Mirror neurons are meant to work out not only what someone is doing and how he feels about it, but also why he is doing it. Perceiving the world is not an individual affair, limited to our own mental capacities, but a process involving shared neural circuitry.

We internalize the experience of others at every moment, automatically and immediately, without conscious effort, using a neural shorthand created of our own experience. In the very act of connecting with someone, even on the most superficial level, we are involved in a relationship of utmost intimacy.

Our understanding of the complexities of our world occurs through the constant melding of the observer with the observed.  To watch someone is to immediately internalize his point of view. This means that the very act of observing another person automatically engages us in a Bond in which we, the subject, fuse with our object. So in a manner of speaking, in order to understand another person, we must temporarily merge with them.

These are not all my words – they are from a book I am reading called “The Bond” by Lynne McTaggart – how to fix your falling down world.  It is a fascinating look at the interconnectedness of all living things. It has changed the way I view everything!

Any Other Option Than Love

healingwallUsually my blogs are not blogs, they’re essays. And usually they’re animal inspired and written while caffeinated. This is none of the above. This is what spirit downloaded to me yesterday while working out, after I asked Spirit how I could help another heal. As usual, I had an idea of the answer – “leave it the fuck alone.” Or as spirit gently puts it: Continue reading