The Wisdom of Hurt ~ building a better world

The times we live in have so many people asking similar questions – how can I help build a better world? Answer: the only way you can – by being yourself. By finding out what you love, what moves your soul, and how you can allow that manifest in the world.

Without a doubt, the loss of my cat Fiona has been the toughest loss of my life. It was my first animal loss, the deepest fissure.  As a young adult my best friend Sinead passed suddenly. She got hit by an Irish bus on a wet day, on the unforgiving Dublin streets. I pushed that grief away for a century or more, until Fiona’s loss helped me deal with it.

I’ve said goodbye to both parents, friends, most of my aunts and uncles, even people that are no longer in my life. I’ve also mourned the person who I thought I was, welcoming in the person I am now. I’ve said goodbye to many more animals along the way. It’s just what happens when you love.

As I recovered from Fiona’s passing, I grew. I grew in ways I could never have understood before. And with that, I decided to help other people deal with pet loss. And that is what I have been doing for over a decade now. It’s taken many forms this quest, but as I say it is just different words to the same song – letting your light shine so other people may find their way home.

I had no idea as a young adult of the power that awaited me beyond the losses of life and that my vulnerability to suffering would be the doorway to healing and to life, and in that process becoming a better person for my community and ultimately myself.

~And this is the only way I know how to build a better world.

The Intimacy of Life and Fleas


It has become increasingly more apparent that who we spend time with really matters.

We have all heard the saying; lie down with dogs, get fleas, or something like that – but when we translate that into real life experience and our desire to be healthy and happy – it could not be more true.

In a study it was discovered that human beings make use of mirror neurons to read emotion as well as action. The same sections of our brain that activate when we experience a range of human emotions, from joy to pain, also activate when we observe the emotion in another. We simply need to observe a person’s facial expression or body language to set the cascade of neurons in motion. When you see someone smile or grimace, as far as your brain is concerned – it is you who are happy or disturbed.

Mirror neurons are meant to work out not only what someone is doing and how he feels about it, but also why he is doing it. Perceiving the world is not an individual affair, limited to our own mental capacities, but a process involving shared neural circuitry.

We internalize the experience of others at every moment, automatically and immediately, without conscious effort, using a neural shorthand created of our own experience. In the very act of connecting with someone, even on the most superficial level, we are involved in a relationship of utmost intimacy.

Our understanding of the complexities of our world occurs through the constant melding of the observer with the observed.  To watch someone is to immediately internalize his point of view. This means that the very act of observing another person automatically engages us in a Bond in which we, the subject, fuse with our object. So in a manner of speaking, in order to understand another person, we must temporarily merge with them.

These are not all my words – they are from a book I am reading called “The Bond” by Lynne McTaggart – how to fix your falling down world.  It is a fascinating look at the interconnectedness of all living things. It has changed the way I view everything!

Any Other Option Than Love

healingwallUsually my blogs are not blogs, they’re essays. And usually they’re animal inspired and written while caffeinated. This is none of the above. This is what spirit downloaded to me yesterday while working out, after I asked Spirit how I could help another heal. As usual, I had an idea of the answer – “leave it the fuck alone.” Or as spirit gently puts it: Continue reading

Why I need an animal communicator.


People say – I can talk to my dog or my cat understands me. What about your cat or dog being understood? I get it that animals read energy better than most human beings. They’re superior to us at a multitude of things, but ask them to understand our words; that’s like asking an Irish woman to  understand why there are no teacups in the house. It simply does not compute. Continue reading

So What Exactly Is A Healing?


Anytime I sit down to write, I get up five minutes later to use the loo. Anytime I walk into a department store and smell perfume and make-up and start lathering my elbows and knees with the most ludicrously expensive facial cream (before being tossed out by one highly-painted Sephora-Geisha), I start frantically looking around for the restrooms and do a well-lubed slide towards them. Anytime I read poetry that either I have written or some other well-troubled Irish poet has, I feel a stirring, and last but not least, anytime I think about my morning latte and then suck it down, I am generally on the loo just to save time. I am also about convenience. Yet, this has become my baseline for happiness. Happiness = movement. Movement = happiness. Continue reading

Don’t Cry For Me


I like to sing. I’ve become quite good over the years, at least my captive audience of four can attest to that. And the songs are utterly random. Anything from “Who let the dogs out” to something from my childhood, or Justin B’s latest jingle that just begs for expression or is that suppression? And teatime is when the songs get sung as the dogs sit, albeit begrudgingly, waiting for their supper, while the cats continue to fight for world dominance, unmoved by my dulcet tones and infusion of Irish jig moves – once more from a long ago but not forgotten childhood. Continue reading